Relationships are hard enough without the constant noise of societal expectations buzzing around like an annoying fly at a picnic. Everywhere you turn, there’s someone (or something) telling you what your relationship should look like. Whether it’s that perfect Instagram couple or your well-meaning aunt asking when you’re getting married, societal expectations can add pressure to relationships in ways we might not even notice. Let’s unpack this together with a little humor and a whole lot of realness.

“When Are You Getting Married?”

The most infamous of all societal expectations. It starts innocently enough when you begin dating someone seriously. Suddenly, everyone wants to know if you’re thinking about “forever”. And heaven forbid you’ve been dating for more than a year without putting a ring on it—cue the eyebrow raises.

But here’s the truth: there’s no magical timeline for commitment. Some couples get engaged after six months, others after six years, and some never marry but are just as committed. Societal pressure can make you feel like your relationship is a ticking time bomb, but let’s face it, a relationship is about two people—you and your partner—not a race to the altar.

“You Should Have Kids, Right?”

Once the marriage pressure subsides, the next question is inevitably about children. Whether you’re 25 or 35, if you’re in a committed relationship, someone will ask when the pitter-patter of little feet is coming. This expectation is so common, it’s practically a rite of passage for couples.

But here’s the kicker: not everyone wants kids, and that’s perfectly okay! Or maybe you do, but on your own timeline. The reality is, the choice to have children is deeply personal and doesn’t need to fit neatly into what society deems appropriate. You can be fulfilled in a relationship whether you choose to have kids, adopt, or even just have fur babies.

The “Perfect” Couple Illusion

With social media, the pressure to have the “perfect” relationship is at an all-time high. Scroll through Instagram, and you’ll see couples posting vacation selfies, matching outfits, and #CoupleGoals that make it seem like they never argue or leave dirty dishes in the sink.

Spoiler alert: even that picture-perfect couple has struggles. What you don’t see are the disagreements about whose turn it is to take out the trash, or the nights when one person just wants some alone time. Relationships are messy, and that’s okay. Trying to meet an unrealistic societal standard is exhausting and unnecessary. In reality, the beauty of a relationship comes from the ups, the downs, and the authentic connection between two people.

Gender Roles in Relationships

Society still has some pretty outdated ideas about gender roles in relationships. You know the ones: men are supposed to be the providers, women should handle the home, and heaven forbid a woman earns more than her partner. These stereotypes can create tension and insecurity, but here’s the good news: relationships are about teamwork, not fitting into prescribed boxes.

In modern relationships, partners often share financial responsibilities, household chores, and emotional labor. It’s about doing what works for you and your relationship, not trying to live up to the 1950s ideal of what love should look like.

The “Strong” Relationship Myth

Society loves to idolize the idea of “sticking it out no matter what” in a relationship. But sometimes, sticking it out isn’t the healthiest option. Relationships evolve, people grow, and sometimes that means recognizing when it’s time to move on. The expectation that a “strong” couple never breaks up is flawed. Real strength is found in being honest with yourself and your partner about what you both need to be happy.

Letting go of a relationship that isn’t working doesn’t make you weak—it makes you self-aware. And in the end, that’s more important than meeting anyone else’s expectations.

Conclusion: Define Your Own Relationship Goals

The bottom line is that societal expectations can feel like invisible hands pushing you and your partner in directions you may not want to go. But the beauty of being in a relationship is that you and your partner get to write your own story. Whether you’re single, dating, married, or happily child-free, remember that your relationship should reflect your values and desires—not what society expects.

So, the next time someone asks when you’re getting married or having kids, feel free to smile and say, “We’re doing things our way.” Because, at the end of the day, the only people who truly know what’s right for your relationship are the ones in it!